Chapter 1: What’s That Again?
I have this terrible habit of keeping supposedly public issues to myself and when the people around me starts to feel that I’m hiding something and forces me to reveal myself, it puts me in a very awkward position because people won’t believe me even though I already told them what I’m keeping to myself. Its like keeping to yourself that Bruce Wayne is Batman and when people forces you to reveal what you’re hiding and decides to tell them the truth (that Bruce Wayne is Batman), of course they won’t just believe that you already told them everything (well, knowing that Bruce Wayne is Batman is kinda like everything already). You get my point?
I don’t know. I’ve always wanted to keep some things to myself since I was a kid. I used to be a big-time liar when I was still in grade school and I think that’s one of the reasons why my high school life was a train-wreck. I kept on saying lies after lies until it piled up to the point where even I can’t tell which ones are true and which ones are not. At age 15, I was a living lie. The people who didn’t know the truths loved me, they loved what they thought was me. And those who did know the truths hated me, they left me forever. And it all started because I just want to keep some things to myself. Geez.
I then realized that I lied too much. I wanted to come clean. I wanted to restore the relationships I’ve have ruined. So I spent some time alone just sorting out things and trying to find the person who I really am. I tried analyzing my speaking patterns, how I communicate to people, how I react when a situation compels me to lie, and how I decide when to lie and when to tell the truth. I did my best. I gave it all I’ve got. I’m happy about the thing’s I’ve learned about myself.
Right after the whole “sorting out” and reflection thing, I went to my class, sat on my chair, talked to my seatmate, and lied.
I failed once again. And this is where the real story starts.
Do you know what’s the worst part about all this? It’s the part where I tell you that I’m already sleepy and will just write the continuation of this story next time. Hah! (cutting off stories like this makes me write more, so yeah. I like it.) Make sure to read the continuation next time as it will have the same amount of nonsense-ness just as this one, or even worse.
- Bridget Gail Andrews [ 21-Nov-2011 | 03:05 ]
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